___________heartbroken\\hurt

im supposed to have blogged this on fridae. but dint have the time to. anyway, i wrote this during our hist ca on thurs, but i wrote everything in chinese. so proud of myself. and btw, i sounds better in chinese. been mugging reall hard these few days. all for [you]. a promise is a promise. i wont go back on my word. i'll make [you] proud, like i am proud of [you]. i realie am proud of [you], [you] noe why. *smiles*

why cant i be with the people i love? this is not the first time.. my heart is broken, again. then again, i dont tink anybody reallie cares. non-existency. my broken heart can nvr be pieced back - it aint a jigsaw puzzle. if it does become whole again, the hurts and scars will always be there. and it doesnt mean that if i dont say anything, i am not bothered. its just that i dont want the people arnd me to worry. im like, this jinx. no matter who it is, but as long as that person means alot to me, they'll leave me, one by one. my heart has shattered, not only once. these scars and wounds accumalated can nvr be healed and will stay with me forever.. non-erasable. i want to cry, but the tears dont flow. i'll definitely go crazy one day. im waiting, badly, for that day to cme. if one day, i lose my memory, i'd rather i nvr know you again. that way, it'd be good for [you] and me -- my heart wont ache ever again, and it would not be so hard on you anymore. the best is that i forget u totally, but obviously, that's not possible. duh. i want to lose my memory, now. my heart is aching badly for [you] now, feels like millions of tiny glass shards piercing through my heart.

[you] said "When there is love, there is miracle.."
i need A miracle, now.
to heal my broken heart.



to [you]:: i cant bring myself to smile. my heart beats for [you]. and if [you] rmbr smth that ever happened, [you]'ll noe wat i mean by this -- "wo3 zhen1 de4 dong3 de2 an1 jing4 le4"
i love [you]. 16